The Difference Between A Compliment And A Catcall

By Anoushka Radhakrishnan

I don’t wear dresses anymore. 
I don’t wear dresses
because dresses have consequences.
I’m fifteen and I’m walking on the sidewalk next to my school,
I am wearing my school uniform
You’re twenty eight and driving a bike 
I wonder what you think 
before you cat call. 

Do you think I’m a cos player? 
Pretending to be underage? 
Or do you think this is a porno? 
Do you think I am walking in front of you 
deliberately? 
Hoping you’ll notice my 
undefined body?

‘He’s just offering a compliment, learn to accept it.’
A compliment? 
A compliment is 
‘Hi, you look nice.’
‘You’re such a kind person’
‘I really like your smile.’
not 
‘Hey, sexy! Wanna come with me?’
Haha, get the joke?
because clearly, he did too.

It’s a compliment?
Is that what your mom told you 
when you were catcalled?
Is that what her mom told her when 
she was catcalled?
That it is just somebody
appreciating
your femininity,
no.
He does not appreciate your beauty
and he doesn’t see you as a woman
but as 
a toy.
a mannequin.
a doll.

You are not a doll, 
You are a human being.
You were born in this world
to live 
Not to feel uncomfortable
by someone else’s doings
and then be told 
you are not uncomfortable,
a compliment does not make you 
feel uncomfortable,
a catcall does.
It wasn’t a compliment then 
and it isn’t a compliment now.

I’m fifteen. 
I want to go home
happy and content. 
I want to go to a party
happy and content.
I want to be 
happy and content.
A compliment makes you feel
happy and content
a catcall makes you feel 
disgusted 
and dirty 
and unsafe 
and not human.

I am fifteen 
and I am wearing my school uniform, 
and I do not appreciate you
raking your eyes up and down 
my body like it is a joyride,
a carnival.
no, 
my body is not a roller-coaster,
my body is not candy,
my body is not yours to enjoy.

I’m fifteen,
I’m twenty,
I’m thirty,
I’m forty, 
and I know the difference between 
a compliment and a catcall
because 
I know the difference
between
a person who respects me
and a person who wants to 
drug me.

I know the difference between a compliment and a catcall
like I know the difference between
my home and that 
god damn sidewalk.
I know the difference between 
a compliment and a catcall
because I know the difference between 
feeling good and
feeling dirty. 

I know the difference between
a compliment and a catcall 
just like I know the difference
between consented sex 
and rape.
I know the difference between
a compliment and a catcall 
because
there’s only one 
that considers 
my consent.

I know the difference between a compliment
and a
catcall 
because both flatter me yet 
there’s only one 
I want to accept.